Psychic Living Radio

Looking for a Free Weight loss program with Support Groups? 

I think I have found the perfect one for you!!

Diet TV.com.. 

I highly recommend giving this one a shot.

Love software

 ( I got this in one of my other groups and thought i would share it. Being the computer person i am ;)

Service Rep: Hello, you have reached the Heart Systems Software Company help desk. How may I help you?

Customer:I just received your latest program, LOVEv4.0...you know....thefreeware. I don't understand it. Can you tell me how to install it?

Service Rep: Sure thing ma'am. Do you have the installation disk and instructions with you?

Customer: Yes I do, but first can you tell me what the program does?

ServiceRep: Sure thing ma'am. LOVE is a unique program, there is no other likeit in the world. LOVE attaches to your operating system and runssilently in the background, you will never see LOVE on your monitor oryour toolbar, but you will notice its affect on every application youmay have. It makes the good programs run smoother and greatly restrictsand/or deletes the bad ones.

Customer: Wow! That sounds great. How does LOVE make my machine run smoother?

ServiceRep: Well, good sound files, like COMPLIMENT.WAV, ENCOURAGEMENT. WAV,and KINDWORD.WAV will play frequently. Also, FORGIVENESS. EXE will beinvoked every time there is an external violation, including theever-popular syntax errors. Also, all those aggravating errors that say"unable to connect" will be avoided. LOVE allows for a smoothconnection with external devices, regardless of what country it ismanufactured in, the brand name, or the age of the model.

Customer: That's exactly what I need, my machine has been isolated for too long. But what about the bad programs?

ServiceRep: Good question. LOVE searches your memory for programs likeHATE.COM, BITTERNESS.EXE, SELFISH.COM, and SPITE.EXE. These programscan't be entirely deleted off your hard drive, but LOVE overpowersthose programs. LOVE stops their commands from being executed and runsits own instructions. You will no longer hear INSULT.WAV and you wontbe able to write with the fonts "BADWORDS12" or "HARSHNESS10" .

Customer: That's a fantastic program you have. Are the upgrades free too?

Service Rep: They sure are ma'am.

Customer: How do I get the upgrades?

ServiceRep: That's easy. Once you have LOVE installed and running, itautomatically copies a module, or a piece of itself, to every externalHarddrive Email And Remote Terminal (HEART) that it comes in contactwith. In turn, those external devices run whatever version of LOVE theyhave and return a module to your HEART. You will be upgraded with eachand every module that you receive. But you have to remember, to receivethe upgrades you have to be running LOVE and you have to come intocontact with other computers while it is running.

Customer: I can do that. I'm not very technical, but I think I am ready to install now. What do I do first?

Service Rep: The first step is to open your HEART. Have you located your HEART ma'am?

Customer: Yes I have, but there are several programs running right now. Is it okay to install while they are running?

Service Rep: What programs are running ma'am?

Customer: Let me see....I have PASTHURT.EXE, LOWESTEEM.EXE, GRUDGE.EXE, and RESENTMENT.COM running right now.

ServiceRep: No problem. LOVE will automatically erase PASTHURT.EXE from yourcurrent operating system. It may remain in your permanent memory, butit will no longer disrupt other programs. LOVE will eventuallyoverwrite LOWESTEEM.EXE with a module of its own called HIGHESTEEM.EXE.However, you have to completely turn off GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM.Those programs prevent LOVE from being properly installed. Can you turnthose off ma'am?

Customer: I don't know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?

ServiceRep: My pleasure. Go to your Start menu and invoke FORGIVENESS. EXE. Dothis as many times as necessary until GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COMhave been completely erased.

Customer: Okay, I'm done.LOVE has started installing itself automatically. Is that normal?

ServiceRep: Yes it is. You should receive a message that says it willreinstall for the life of your HEART. Do you see that message?

Customer: Yes I do. Is it completely installed?

ServiceRep: Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You need tobegin connecting to other HEART's in order to get the upgrades.

Customer: Oops...I have an error message already. What should I do?

Service Rep: What does the message say?

Customer: It says "ERROR 412 - PROGRAM NOT RUN ON INTERNAL COMPONENTS". What does that mean?

ServiceRep: Don't worry ma'am, that's a common problem. It means that the LOVEprogram is set up to run on external HEARTS but has not yet been run onyour HEART. It is one of those complicated programming things, but innon-technical terms it means you have to "LOVE" your own machine beforeit can "LOVE" others.

Customer: So what should I do?

Service Rep: Can you find the directory called "SELF-ACCEPTANCE" ?

Customer: Yes, I have it.

Service Rep: Excellent, you are getting good at this.

Customer: Thank you.

ServiceRep: You're welcome. Click on the following files and then copy them tothe "MYHEART" directory: FORGIVESELF. DOC, SELFESTEEM.TXT,REALIZEWORTH. TXT, and GOODNESS.DOC. The system will overwrite anyconflicting files and begin patching any faulty programming. Also, youneed to delete SELFCRITIC.EXE from all directories, and then empty yourrecycle bin afterwards to make sure it is completely gone and nevercomes back.

Customer: Got it. Hey! My HEART is filling up withreally neat files. SMILE.MPG is playing on my monitor right now and itshows that WARMTH.COM, PEACE.EXE, and CONTENTMENT. COM are copyingthemselves all over my HEART!

Service Rep: Then LOVE is installed and running. You should be able to handle it from here. One more thing before I go...

Customer: Yes?

ServiceRep: LOVE is freeware. Be sure to give it and its various modules toeverybody you meet. They will in turn share it with other people andthey will return some really neat modules back to you.

Customer: I will. Thank you for your help.

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